Thursday, March 11, 2010

A Boot Smack

Sometimes I want to reach through the computer and hug the bloggers who put up their posts. (What? I'm a huggy person!)  This one, from Big Girl Bombshell, is no exception. In trying to figure out how to get out of this rut I'm in and get my shit straight, figuring out where to start and a gentle reminder of the many resources I have at my finger tips just waiting to be utilized.

Her post put me in a reflective sort of mind. I think I have lost my focus a bit. Which being the societally-norm ADD person that I am, isn't that unusual.

I'm walking along the path of life, weight loss, decluttering (or at least talking and thinking about it) and living and something shiny and new comes along . . . oooh . . . running (my latest bunny trail)  . . . and off I go! Sometimes that bunny trail leads me back to the path I'm supposed to be on, sometimes not. This one did. But I feel like I'm farther back than where I started. Why? Because I focused on that and little else. I did think about what I was eating, but wasn't purposeful about it.

Ya know something? I think that's the key. I can do all these things at the same time. I just have to be purposeful about it.
This reminds me of a verse Mom used to quote quite a bit. Ecclesiastes 9:10 Whatever your hand finds to do, do it with all your might;
I have decided to take on this weight loss thing and lose a total of 77 pounds. But I've not been working very hard at it recently. Sure, I give it good lip service. I'm good at that. I was a church kid! Lip service is one of those things you learn early! Then you have to grow up and make a decision to continue the lip service, make a real commitment to it, or chuck it. <-- Isn't this true about everything though?

When you start something you're gung ho, because it's new, it's shiny, it's even fun! Time passes and it becomes routine, the shininess wears off, and it becomes work to continue doing it. As you learn more about whatever it is, you develop or learn shortcuts and find yourself taking those. The results from whatever it is begin to lessen and you wonder why? Aren't you doing the same thing you always were? So you begin looking for motivation outside yourself (in my case others weight loss blogs). Sometimes you find it and it really helps . . . for a while. Sometimes you find nothing. You're having a crappy time of it and everyone else is talking about the weight they've lost and how much they love the foods their eating and though they want chocolate, they're not eating it. You start feeling sorry for yourself and grab another chocolate from the stash your mother-in-law brought you and your husband (because she doesn't want it in her house!) and turn on the TV to watch NCIS or Criminal Minds.

Okay . . . yea. So that's been my weight loss journey so far in a nutshell. I'm learning though, I can't find motivation in other people. Other people can't be my motivation. The can help motivate, but they can't be the motivation. I have to find it within me, or it's just not going to happen.
Sometimes the people just give you a gentle boot up the ass in the direction you need to go and a smack in the face to wake you up to all of the resources you already have.

Thanks for the boot and smack Big Girl Bombshell! Seriously!

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