Do you ever have a temper tantrum and get really furious and worked up about it, then when you calm down you can't quite figure out why you were so angry? Well . . . No. I do know why I was angry. It's frustrating to have the same conversation with your doctor EVERY. SINGLE. TIME. you have your blood drawn and get the results back.
No, the lab range is wrong. I am not normal. I'm still high.
No, my cholesterol and my thyroid are linked. I don't have a history of high cholesterol and I've been eating well, so why are you putting me on medication again?
Are you not seeing the pattern? My thyroid is high, my cholesterol is high. My thyroid is normal, my cholesterol is normal.
Seriously? It's just a tad frustrating!
Of course now that I've calmed down, cleared my head and have bitched to the entire world about this . . . I'm fine. And my doctor . . . Dr. C himself! called me this morning! ARGH!! I saw that his office was calling, but I let it go to voicemail. (I assumed it was his nurse.)
No, I've not called him back yet. I need to gather up and regroup what exactly was making me so absolutely furious yesterday. Have my list of questions and suggestions ready and be in a confident and calm place.
(Maybe I should go back and read yesterday morning's post again . . . Not that I've forgotten what I wrote, but it was written in the throes of extreme emotion.)
Okay, so I skimmed it. I'll call him back at lunch . . . after lunch and discuss my results with him as well as set up a time to have my thyroid . . . umm . . . ultrasounded (I know, that's not a word . . . I like making up words! Especially when I can't think of the word I want; which is happening more often these days.). Have an ultrasound done on my thyroid so I know exactly what I'm dealing with thyroid-wise so I know from a diet standpoint what I can do.
I may go ahead and ask him to suggest an endo. (Specifically one who deals in e-mails as well!) My thyroid isn't so bad that Dr. C can't handle it, but I need someone who can see the whole picture and isn't looking at each issue separately.
That's where my frustration is really coming in.
I find it kind of ironic because I am NOT a big picture person. I get bogged down in details. I need someone (like my Italian) to pull me back and help me see the big picture. I need a Dr. who can do both. Be a big picture person and see how everything is connected AS WELL AS being able to address the specifics and help me see how things connect.
I need a doctor I'm not fighting with all the time either . . . or arguing with rather. Maybe Dr. C just isn't the right fit. But I really do like him. As much as I've bashed him, I really do like him. He's nice, he's personable. He knows my husband and has been my husband's doctor FOR-EV-ER. He's also my in-laws doctor.
But maybe he's just not the right fit for me.
I don't know.
I think I'll have a better picture after I talk to him.
Have you ever had to break up with your doctor? How do you do it?
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